Hit the high street after work last night (had to leave work early because no late night shopping on a Tuesday obviously). Must have looked at a billion grey suits (trousers, skirts, shift-dresses, cropped pants, shorts??? with every style of jacket imaginable). All horrible on my fat, wobbly, oaf-like frame! Bugger!!! Note to self-must go on a sodding diet! I have re-gained all the weight I lost while grief-stricken in the days after Mark walked out. Must be more calories in wine than I thought?
It wasn't an altogether fruitless expedition though. I did manage to come home with a t-shirt emblazoned with the slogan: 'Single and desperate' (I thought it was kitch for about 5 seconds!), a pair of this seasons wet-look leggings (with my thighs?-BIG MISTAKE), and two seriously low-cut tops (my fall-back plan). I told you I was crap at shopping.
I rang Lola again and proved the t-shirt slogan right:
'Please Lola, shop with me! I am desperate'!
She said 'no' again at first, but once I described to her the delights I had so far managed to pick up while shopping alone she relented and promised to come. Everybody wants to be needed, right?
'Thursday night is late night shopping. I'll meet you at Starbucks. I may have my new man-friend in tow-I trust this will not be a problem'?
I needed her help so much that I would have agreed to anything. But now that I think about it I am a little weirded out by having a strange man tag along while I try on various undoubtedly unflattering outfits. I just hope he's a nice guy-Lola has a tendency to go for swines! But I will admit to being more than a bit excited about finally meeting her mysterious man! She has kept him a secret from Cass and I for months now and that has to mean something, doesn't it?
I rang Cass right away to tell her!
'Oh, I can't believe you're gonna get to meet him', she moaned, as I knew she would. 'Make sure to take 'The List' with you. It will save us loads of time later'.
The List is something Cass and I devised months ago,-especially for Lola-, to help her find the right man after years of dating losers, wasters and good-for-nothings. We used to call it the 'Lola List' but since my sudden revert back to single status I have been informed by my girls that it should now be known simply as 'The List' and can apply to any one of us (including Cass, should she find herself up-dating her own status any time soon).
Usually we would all go through 'The List' after Lola has been on 2 or three dates with a new man and shows interest in seeing him some more. It contains questions like:
-Is he ready to commit?
-If so, why is he not already committed?
-Or is he???
As well as:
-Does he smoke?
-How much does he earn?
-What are his thoughts on having children?
You get the idea!
Depending on the answers to these questions, as a group, we decide if it's worth Lolas while actually seeing said guy again, or whether she should wave bye-bye and move on (we deem anymore than three dates with a man who isn't serious long-term potential at this point in her life a total waste of dating energy.
Up until now Lola has been perfectly happy with this arrangement, but since meeting the 'mystery man' (whose name she won't even share with us) she has refused to answer any questions on The List, and has insisted The List be 'shelved' until further notice!
As Cass has so correctly pointed out, by meeting and spending time with Lola and her fella I will now be in a position to suss out answers to some of the questions on The List, and therefore try to guide our dear friend in the most appropriate direction in which to take her 'relationship'. Oh, the weight of responsability!
I assured Cass that I will indeed have The list about my person on Thursday night and also promised to call her the second I get home and fill her in on all details (she did not seem interested in any details about my interview outfit-I will have to sqeeze that in too).
There is hope! I know with Lola's help I will knock 'em dead! Wish me luck!!!!!
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