Part 28-where I eventually come clean!

Okay, okay, I know I left you hanging there. I just wasn't in the right place to tell the world what a doofus I have been. Instead I've been hiding under the safety of my duvet and trying not to talk to ANYONE for ages! But I finally caught up with the girls a few nights ago, cleared the air with Lola, and filled them in on my most ridiculous exploit to date.

And now i'm ready to share it with you lot too...

So there we were, Nigel and I, sitting in the dimly lit Wine and Tapas bar getting sozzled on Rioja and -amazingly- chatting away like two old pals. Don't ask me what we talked about because I don't remember a word of it, but to look at us I'm sure anyone would have thought we were a couple, the way we were snuggled so close on the tiny couch and making each other laugh.

Shudder!

I don't know how many bottles we emptied, but I vaughly remember that we moved onto tequila slammers at some point before the bar staff suggested we'd enjoyed enough of their hospitality! Utterly mortifying, I know, but at the time it just seemed so hilarious!
We stood out on the street and laughed our heads off. I remember thinking how cool it was to have been thrown out of a bar! God, we must have looked pathetic!

Then somehow laughing together turned into snogging each other like two hormone-ridden teenagers after the school disco! (Just the memory of this makes me want to vomit-my lips touched Nigel's greasy face-gag)!

We were eating the face off each other in public! Out on the street right in front of the Tapas bar window! Ugh! How utterly undignified! And what about those poor people still inside, tucking into their platters of octopus tentacles and garlic mushrooms! How could they keep it down?
Then I think Nigel actually pushed me up against the wall and things began to get a little frisky! The awful thing is that I must have been enjoying it, because although I pushed him away for long enough to hail a passing taxi, we did climb into said taxi together and continue snogging all the way back to mine...

And when the taxi pulled up outside my place?
Yes you've guessed it, we both got out!

Each time I think about this I pray none of the neighbours were gawking out of their windows! The shame! To have arrived home with a man old enough to be my father (well, near enough) who is slightly balding and has a belly like a pregnant woman!

We must have continued drinking when we got home because the following morning I found an empty wine bottle on the coffee table and a couple of empty glasses.

I also found myself, in BED, next to the most awful, puke-enducing creature on God's earth: I 'm ashamed to admit it but I woke up in bed with NIGEL!

THANKFULLY we were both FULLY clothed!

Obviously the alcohol had got the better of us and prevented any shenanigans from taking place! Oh thank you Lord for inventing brewers droop! Plus, the evidence would suggest that I may have been sick, several times, in various parts of the house...no surprises there then!

Can you imagine how much worse things would be if I had actually slept with NIGEL?

Things are bad enough, because he now thinks he's actually in with a chance and flirts with me at every opportunity! Being in the office is a nightmare, and he isn't exactly being subtle about it! He doesn't even have the shame to be embarrassed! It's cringe-worthy. But it's all my fault.

I haven't seen or heard from the wonderful Mr. Dashwood since he legged it home to the Missus. -so much for working closely together! And I bet if Nigel's been in contact with him (which i'm sure he has) he will have embellished the details of what happened that night to make himself appear stud-like, rather than the (thankful) letdown that he turned out to be! So no chance for me there at all now...not that I would want one.

I think I have learned a lesson from all of this:
I'm not ready to get into the whole sex/dating thing yet. I know that Nigel was never going to be anybody's Mr. Right, but I'm just thankful that I didn't do it with Donal either. Because I'm not ready for the emotional up-heaval that moving on to someone new will eventually bring. And plus...yet another married man! At least this one WASN'T cheating on his wife!

I miss Mark all over again!
Typical!

Oh, and by the way, Lola is still dating her married man. I hate it, but I can't hate her, so i've decided to try and just ignore any mention of him or the fact that he exists. Might get a bit difficult though, because from what I can tell, Lola is really falling for him. Sooner or later there are going to be pieces to put back together. I just dread being the one to say "I told you so....".